Sunday, January 13, 2013

I Hate Goodbyes

I hate goodbyes...that's practically it. How can I be expected to suddenly leave all these people behind that have formed and shared such an important part of my life?

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Dear Kerri

Dear Kerri of June 2012,
   AFS has just sent you your host family and your anxiety is consistently building up. You are scheduled to leave in about two months and everything about your exchange is becoming real...you're so nervous and so excited. Counting down the days on your computer desktop and your iPod, you know exactly how much time is left until it finally happens. Basically every thought is starting to involve Argentina...whatever happened to Montana? Take a second...a breathe...and look around at your surroundings. Think about how much you are going to miss everything that you have right now: your family, your home, your friends, etc. Yes, you have so much to be excited for, but how did you not notice that you were going to miss so much what you had? Now, go out and enjoy your last few months at home instead of counting and wishing it away.
   You're almost frustrated with how little you know of about the next six months of your life, about how many questions you have. You have very little idea, but an incredible six months are in store for you. AFS is trying to help you, give you suggestions, tell you what it will be like, but you're having trouble believing them-somehow thinking that you're exchange will be totally different than everyone else's. They are right. You will come home a different person. You will be homesick, you will have some of your lowest lows but also some of your highest highs. You will grow and mature an unbelievable amount. The Facebook message that you got the other day from the random people? They are your family now. The friend requests that you received from the random teenagers? They are your best friends. And the 2012-2013 Argentina Facebook group? They are your lifeline, the only others that understand exactly what you are experiencing. You are forming expectations like AFS told you not to...and in some ways those expectations will let you down. But don't worry, the good will so much outweigh the bad.
   Be excited for the next six months of your life. But don't forget to get out there and enjoy your last few months at home, you will miss it.
   -Kerri of January 2013

Dear Kerri of August 2012,
  You are finally starting to buy host family gifts and pack because you leave in a few days. You are so anxious, so nervous yet so excited...and that is perfectly 100% okay and normal. Everyone is feeling the same as you. Now, say goodbye to life as you knew it and hop on that plane. An unbelievably adventure is ahead.
   -Kerri of January 2013

Dear Kerri of September 2012,
  You have been in Cordoba, Argentina for a few weeks. Already, you've met so many people and seen so many amazing things...and think, this is just the beginning. I know that you are realizing that it is going to be so much harder getting adjusted to a totally different lifestyle away from home, but everything does get better.  And it's hard being away from home, but believe me when I tell you that you absolutely did not make a mistake. The new language is a shock, but before you know it you will be talking Spanish in your sleep...it will come, I promise. It seems like 6 months is forever, like January will never come in a million years; it will. And when it does, you'll be willing to give anything to be able to have that time back.
  Be positive. Be outgoing. Get involved. Take pictures of everything. Talk as much as you can, you want to learn the language. Take in every single moment that you have in this wondrous place. Understand that some things don't meet your expectations, that things aren't like you imagined, but embrace it. Before long, everything that seems so weird will become so normal. You are starting to change, to mature, to see the world from so many other viewpoints. Be excited, this is just the beginning and you have so much to look forward to.
   -Kerri of January 2013

Dear Kerri of January 2013,
   The time has almost come. You have reached your last week left in Argentina. The time has flown by faster than you eveeeer imagined it could. Once again, the anxiety returns to you-the mutual feelings of nervousness and excitedness. You want to see your family, your home, your friends like no other. You miss them so much and you absolutely can't wait until the moment that you can embrace them, have them in your arms instead of talking over Skype. But at the same time, you never want to leave this new place...it's become your second home. In one second, you will have to leave your new best friends, your new family, your new way of life and you are expecting that this will be pretty much the hardest thing you have done in all of your exchange. Learn from your mistakes. Remember when you were so excited and overwhelmed to be leaving in August that you forgot to take advantage of what you had? Don't do that again. Take in everything. Do everything. Don't waste a second of your time left in Cordoba, no matter how hard it may be. It's right outside your window, now go embrace it because I can guarantee that in a month, two months, a year, or a decade, you will give anything to have this time left.
   P.S.-Start packing early. This time your mom isn't here to help you and you have bought so much on your trip that you have no idea how you'll fit it all. :)
   -Kerri of the future